INTERNET MARRIAGES
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About two or three years ago on this platform, I said 'Whoever brings her marriage to facebook, will be divorced on YouTube and will observe her Iddah period on instagram'. When we keep advising people to take their marital life off the internet, people think we are preaching an extreme version of Islam or it's because African men are not romantic. We are all aware of the ongoing saga in the last few days about the highly glorified romantic couple on earth. Many of our sisters both the married and teens alike have been following their pages, downloading their videos and pictures for years now, perhaps some women even wish their husbands were like him, perhaps many of our sisters have been crushing on him, yet the same people are now criticizing him, such is life.
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If you place your marriage in public, people will have an opinion in your marriage; when it falls, when it rises, when it's jolly, when it's tough, when it enjoys wealth and when it suffers poverty, because you were the one that submitted your marriage for public scrutiny in the first place, so you have to keep explaining to people, without getting paid for it.
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I have always expected since all this years that people who are close to them would advise them about Gheerah and secrecy, even though women in their nature loves to be displayed and celebrated, the companions were the best of generations and had the best of marriages, yet they concealed it, but Allah still made their marriages apparent to us because those were the real blessed marriages. Ateekah bint Zaid radiAllahu anhaa was an extremely beautiful female companion, when she was under Umar, he disliked her idea of going to the mosque so that she won't be seen by other men, when she was under Zubair Ibn Awwam too, he tried to discourage her, infact one night, Zubayr hid in a dark spot, when Ateekah was passing on her way to the masjid for Ishaa, Zubayr poked her at the back, out of fear, she ran back home and since then she never went to the masjid again, so one day Zubayr enquired about the reason, and she told him that 'people have become corrupt' . Zubayr smiled and said 'I was the one who touched you', but the message has been passed. This was narrated in At'tabaqat of Ibn Sa'ad.
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The companions were shy of people seeing their spouses but the men of today proudly show off their spouses to the world. When you play ball with her, you post it. when you eat with her, you post it. The prophet salalahu alayhi wassalam said:
Be secretive in your affairs, for it's true that the fortunate person is always envied. (As'Saheehah)
We know what envy means and it leads to nothing but hatred, jealousy and the evil eye against such people. You all taught that all their followers loved them, but we can all see the hate comments and mockery being bombarded at them now. Either their marriage is a scam or not, it is not for us to condemn them or conclude until they prove themselves. I hope our sisters have learnt a lot from this Shenanigan, if you bring your marriage to the net, everybody will automatically become your e-inlaw.
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People now post their pregnancy conception news online, I hope you will also post the miscarriage if it happens ?
People now report their spouses in online groups that contains thousands of people, how can thousands of people advise you at the same time, which of the thousand advices will you choose?
May Allah not put us in a situation where we will now have to prove our marriage to the world with documents before people believe or disbelieve in our marriage.