The Italian

The Italian:
One day I go to Toronto and stay in a bigga hotel. I go down to eat soma breakfast. I tella the waitress I wanna twopissa toast. She bring me only one piss. I tella her I wanna two piss; she say, go to toilet - I say, you nounderstand, I wanna two piss on my plate. She say you betta no pisson plate, you sonna ma b*tch! I don't even know lady, she calla mesomma ma b*tch. Then I go to pharmacia with a cougha. The man he give me candy anatell me fa cough! - I don't even know man ana he tella me FA COUGH!Later I got to eat soma lunch at Ricky's Place, the waitress shebring me spoon, a knife but no fock. I tella her I wanna fock - Shetell me everybody wanna fock. I tella her, you no understand, Iwanna fock on table. She say you betta not fock on table you sonnama b*tch - I not even know lady ana she call me sonna ma b*tch. So, I go back to my hotel room, an there's no sheet on my bed. Icalla the manager and tella him I wanna sheet, he tell me go totoilet. So, I say, you no understand, I wanna sheet on bed. He sayyou betta not sheet on bed you sonna ma b*tch. I don't even know manana he call me sonna ma b*tch! I go to check out of hotel and man at desk say peace to you. I saypeace on you too!, you sonna ma b*tch! - I GO BACK TO ITALY!!!